I can pause for a moment…

posted in: Letters to Rob 0

My grief feels like I am climbing up a mountain every day. For the most part, I can endure the climb. However, every once in a while I need to find a ledge, take a breath, and rest for a while. California is a ledge for me. It is a break from my heavy grief. Here, I can take a breath, reflect, and allow myself to feel some of my loss. And, although I know that I must continue to climb my journey of grief, this is where I can pause for a moment.

I miss you so much Rob. Your death has profoundly changed me. You have gifted me the opportunity to live in a more meaningful way, and you have taught me so much. I wish that you were right beside me as I sit on this bench and stare at the beautiful ocean. I would tell you the story of your death, how much I miss you, and all that you have done for so many people.

Then, I would give you the longest hug, tell you how much I love you, hold your face in my hands, kiss your forehead, and continue up the mountain until I see you again.

For You, Because of You and In Memory of You